A Useful Guide for Learning How to Bottom – Learn the Techniques of Bottoming
If you want to learn how to bottom you’re going to need to know how to prepare yourself for that very first time. No amount of talking is going to really let you know what the sensations would be like, but hopefully, this guide to bottoming for beginners will help anyone interested in bottoming become more prepared for when that time comes.
What Is Bottoming?
Bottoming is the act of receiving penetration, typically in reference to people with penises receiving anal penetration from someone with a penis or dildo. The person penetrating in this instance would be called a top. Bottoming is a way to experience a lot of pleasure through the prostate or the male G-spot. Being a bottom in a relationship means that you are usually if not always a partner who receives penetration. Not all relationships are easily divided into bottoms and tops, many people identify as vers or versatile, meaning that they enjoy both penetrating and being penetrated depending on the situation. If you’re considering trying bottoming for the first time, it is important to know that this doesn’t necessarily mean that you are becoming a gay bottom. You are free to experiment, decide what you like, and then change your mind about that at any time.
How to Prepare to Bottom for the First Time
There are a lot of important tips for bottoming that will help you prepare yourself for trying it for the first time. Remember that learning to the bottom isn’t just reading about it, there are quite a few things that you may need to actually do in order to prepare yourself. The first of these things is anal training. If you want to call it gay bottom training you may, but anyone who wishes to be anally penetrated should be aware of how anal training works. It is an important thing to do to make sure that anal sex is most comfortable and enjoyable for everyone involved. Anal training requires you to gradually ease into inserting fingers or very small sex toys, then maybe penises, butt plugs, or dildos into the anus. There are actually two sphincters that are involved in anal sex. The first is your anal sphincter, AKA your butt hole, which you can contract and relax voluntarily.
The second one is higher up, about a few inches into your rectum, and this one can not be voluntarily controlled. For this reason, training this sphincter to relax and not remain tense and closed would make a huge difference in the pleasure of anal sex. To do this, insert a well-lubricated pinky finger into your own anus just to test it out. Then once that feels comfortable, you can go for a larger finger like the ring finger or the index finger.
Do this once per day until it starts to feel like you can go a bit further. You can then start experimenting with two fingers or even a small toy. Never put anything in your anus that doesn’t have a flared base. Inserting something without a flared base can send you on an embarrassing trip to the emergency room, so avoid it even if it’s tempting. Training your second sphincter to relax is essential for the enjoyment and ease of anal sex.
What about Cleanliness?
It wouldn’t be a guide to bottoming without a conversation about diet and douching. Let it be known that having a healthy diet with plenty of fiber and good hydration should allow for everything to pass smoothly from the gut without leaving remnants of a bowel movement in the anal cavity. Even so, many people who bottom do partake in anal douching, enemas and cleanses. If you are having stomach problems or you haven’t had a bowel movement that day, it might be better to hold off or use one of these options. Some people find it best to eat foods that won’t irritate their stomachs or make for any complications in the bathroom about 24 hours before participating in anal. A high fiber diet or a diet that is free from too much dairy, grease, processed foods, and spicy foods is best. If you still want to play it safe, a douching bulb is easy to use to rinse out the cavity with clean pure water and a bit of time in the shower.
Keeping in mind that the anus isn’t a self-lubricating organ, you are certainly going to need to invest in some lubricant before you even think about putting something in your bum. Lubricants can really make or break a bottoming experience, so invest in a good one so that you can maximize pleasure. Silicone-based lubes are great for anal sex but note that they shouldn’t be used with silicone sex toys because silicone lube can erode silicone toys. Oil-based lubes are fine but feel more greasy. Water-based lubes would also work, but you may have to keep reapplying as they dry up quickly.
Gay Bottom Positions
There is the classic cowgirl (boy), doggy style, and missionary. Most positions that allow access for penetration are good for bottoming. The ones that allow a bit of a reach around for some stimulation of the bottom’s genitals absolutely sweeten the deal. The spooning position, rear-entry positions, and flatiron position are great for just that.
Now that you have some more information about what to expect while bottoming, you might be ready to experiment with some solo sessions. You can then move on to partnered sex when you feel ready for it. Don’t rush anything and make sure that you feel comfortable with your partner before you jump into something brand new. Have fun and remember that this should feel good for everyone, so if something doesn’t feel quite right, have a convo with your partner to see what might help make things more pleasurable.
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